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One would easily presume through experience plus trial and error, that you can finally get massive success in your relationships. Going through life and relationships with experience but without knowledge is more like a shot in the dark.
You’ll find success but it’ll take quadruple the time and effort than it would have taken you if you had studied up and read some books on communication and relationships
Books are blueprints laid out by scholars and professionals. Wouldn’t it be much better to learn their secrets rather than developing your own along the way?
If you are genuinely focused on leveling up in life plus in your relationship, Check out these 8 life-changing books on relationships and communication
- The subtle art of not giving a fuck
- Master your emotions
- The unplugged Alpha
- The rules of love
- The way of the superior man
- Attached
- Seven principles for making a marriage work
- Act like a lady, think like a man
Practice makes perfect, but books give you power. Some books can really help you transcend your mind and your beliefs. These books mentioned down below have helped me go from an 18-year-old skinny loser to constantly dating, partying, and finally being in a 3-year happy relationship.
Book 1: The Art Of Not Giving a Fuck
It’s hard to ignore this book. Besides its blockbuster title and cover, The book really delivers on helping you live your best life by aiding you to get rid of all your unnecessary worries and negative thoughts in life.
“The art of not giving a fuck” opens up beautifully on the trivial beliefs and “fucks” we give about certain things.
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The book gets right to the point. It doesn’t sugarcoat anything, in the first few pages, Mark Manson states that everyone wants you to believe that the key to a good life is either having a nicer car, more cars, a prettier girlfriend, having a hot tub, a pool for your kids and so on.
He states that this brainwashed society and the “giving more fucks about everything” messes with our minds because we are too focused on superficial and fake mirages of happiness.
The moral of the book is the belief, that the key to a good life is not giving a care about more; it’s giving a care about less, and only giving care and energy to what’s true and important to you.
Quote from (The Art Of Not Giving a Fuck):
I see life in the same terms. We all get dealt cards. Some of us get better cards than others. And while its easy to get hung up on our cards and feel we got screwed over, the real game lies in the choices we make with those cards, the risks we decide to take, and the consequences we choose to live with.
Book 2: Master Your Emotions
By the age of 18, I had only been on two dates, and they didn’t lead to anything major. From then I decided that something had to change.
To learn and be successful in a relationship it’s not only important to educate yourself in relationship books. It’s important to be a more complete person in every aspect of your life.
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Emotions play a major part in our lives. Emotions, personally were a big obstacle for me, because I was dealing with social anxiety, approaching girls’ anxiety and stress. So learning more about my emotions and how to control them was a massive move forward for me.
Master your emotions by Thibaut Meurisse was by far one of my favorite books on mastering my own emotions, mainly because the book contains a lot of practical exercises on dealing with your emotions.
Quote from (Master Your Emotions)
When your mind tells you, “You’re tired. Lets rest”, it’s not an order. You don’t have to follow it. You aren’t your emotions. Neither are you your mind. Not matter what though may cross your mind, you can choose to either accept it, or ignore it.
Book 3: The Unplugged Alpha
Not a book that many gurus would mention… yet. Richard Cooper the author of unplugged alpha has been gaining a lot of traction and influence from his book and especially his Youtube Channel.
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Richard Cooper’s approach to his teachings is a bit harsh but that’s why I really like it. The truth isn’t supposed to be soft and sweet because the world is a hard and ruthless place. Therefore getting a wake-up call from someone like Richard Cooper is what many of us need.
The unplugged alpha’s main purpose is the teaching of how to be a valuable masculine man. The book really allowed me to see things more clearly as an alpha male. Learning to be alpha is knowing what you like, what you want, where you’re going, and lastly putting yourself first.
Quote From (The Unplugged Alpha):
Never forget: Women break rules for alphas and make them for betas.” “When women say: “I don’t do that,” always add to it in your head: “With you.” Because she’ll do it with a man who she deems worthy of such sexual gymnastics.
Book 4: The Rules Of Love
I would place “the rules of love” as one of the best books for beginners in relationships and love. It’s really simple to grasp and digest. I would recommend this book first, before moving on to other books such as the “unplugged alpha”.
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Although this book has a very basic tone and knowledge without the special type content like the other books, I would still read it again and recommend it. Because sometimes it can be the basic things that people mess up in relationships. “You’ve got to learn to walk before you learn how to run”
Quote From (The Rules Of Love)
If you cant trust them you haven’t got a relationship. Trust is an essential between partners. It doesn’t matter whether you’re talking about being faithful, sticking to promises, keeping spending within what you can afford or anything else. If you can’t trust your partner, you’ll never be happy
Book 5: The Ways Of The Superior Man
A book that caught my eye just by its title. (Not gonna lie). But after closer examination, the book really shed light on male and female relationships in a way that I never read anywhere else before.
To give you a more descriptive detail, this book really dives deep into understanding polarity.
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Polarity is defined on Google as the state of having two opposite or contradictory tendencies, opinions, or aspects. To expand polarity in greater detail it is Up and down, East and west, hot-cold. Then there is male and female. masculine and feminine energy.
This book teaches you that polarity can be a massive contributing factor to your communication and understanding of your partner. A good example I got out of it, Is how the masculine grows through challenges and how we try to challenge our girlfriends or wives.
Masculine men are very competitive. Such as dating. For them, dating is all about numbers.
- How many women they’ve slept with?
- How hot the girls they dated were?
- Challenge to go talk to that random girl?
- How long they can last in bed with a girl?
Women, on the other hand, operate from a different kind of energy. The feminine energy. Women aren’t meant to be challenged instead their energy comes from praise.
Quote from (The Ways Of The Superior Man)
The way a man penetrates the world should be the same way he penetrates his woman: Not merely for personal gain or pleasure, but to magnify love, openness, and depth
Book 6: Attached
A very practical book. Attached was one of those books that not only shared valuable information and insight it provided many questions which helped me uncover what type of attachment style I have when it comes to relationships.
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Getting attached to our partners is a natural human drive. That’s why it’s important to understand the science of adult attachments. Because it can help us understand and deal with our relationships in better ways.
The book expands on 4 different attachment styles:
- Anxious attachment style
- Avoidant attachment style
- Secure attachment style
- Fearful attachment style
Quote from (Attached)
Remain true to your authentic self. Playing games will only distance you from your ultimate goal of finding true happiness, Be it with your current partner or with someone else.
Book 7: Seven Principles For Making a Marriage Work
You don’t have to be in a marriage to read this. Reading this, even if you’re not in a relationship can help you map out what your future in dating, relationships, and marriage is going to look like.
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John M. Gottman rips apart marriage consultants and therapists for their outdated approach to a happy relationship. The 7 principles aren’t just bits of tips and advice laid out by another author.
The seven principles for making a marriage work builds through conceivable action and advice.
Quote from (Seven Principles For Making a Marriage Work)
You scratch my back and I yours.” Some researchers believe that what distinguishes good marriages from failing ones is that in good marriages spouses respond in kind to each other’s positive overtures.
Book 8: Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man
Steve Harvey is the man. Besides being a very entertaining Tv host on (Ask Steve), and sharing very valuable advice to women. Steve’s book “Act like a lady, think like a man” is a sure solution for any woman wanting to be in a serious committed relationship.
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Steve Harvey spilled the beans and revealed every secret about guys. He focuses on teaching women what men really think about love, relationships, intimacy, and commitment.
This book was written for the purpose of use by women, but however, as the man I am, I like to be steps ahead of women. So by reading this I can catch if a woman is applying any of the rules and advice that steve advises women to put on their men.
Quote from (Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man
The three thing a man needs are Support,Loyalty and the Cookie
Conclusion
I had taken a step back from learning and reading books for some time, because I have it all now, a good salary, confidence, and a girlfriend. But writing this article has again lit up the flame under my belly to learn more and to grow as an individual.
I’ve realized that I am not the same person I was when I was very committed to being the best in relationships and in life. Being content with your life is the sure way of moving backward in life.
If you’re really committed to being the best version of yourself in romance and communication I would advise you to read the books mentioned above.
Books and knowledge are the greatest sources of becoming different and changing for the better.
Studying the super-rich and powerful such as Elon Musk, Bill Gates, and warren buffet I’ve realized that they all have one thing in common, which makes them so great. And that is reading a lot of books.
Elon Musk is the creator of Tesla, Space X and Paypal. When asked on how he know so much about making rockets and doing business. Elon said that he learned everything from reading books.
