Is It Unhealthy To Be Single? The Good and Bad

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It’s so crazy that we live in a society that frowns upon being single, in this read I’m going to ease your mind on why you shouldn’t stress too much about being single.

So let’s get to it, is it unhealthy to be single for a long time?

Being single is not unhealthy. Single doesn’t mean lonely, being in a relationship doesn’t mean happiness. You should take your time and not surrender to society’s pressures because the worst thing in life is not being alone, it’s ending up with someone that will make you feel alone.

To Be Single

There are science and research that can tell you about the effects of being single. Being single may not be the bread and butter, as there are disadvantages as well as advantages to being single. Continue on reading to learn more.

What Are The Benefits Of Being Single

1) Being Single Lets Us Have More Friends

Studies have shown that you lose 2-3 of your friends when you get into a romantic relationship. That is because romantic relationships consume up a lot of time emotionally.

Being in a relationship can occupy your mind about your significant other, and you come to find that your forcing to hit up your closest friends.

A 2012 study by ScienceDaily tells us that a wide circle of friends is key to mid-life wellbeing for both sexes. When we are single we tend to operate in more free time and space, therefore, it allows us to stay in touch, ask for help and receive help. And it, therefore, allows us to develop more and greater friendships with both our friends and our family.

2) Being Single is Better for your Health

Physical health

Without a doubt, we could somewhat agree that being in a relationship does add a bit of flab to our bellies. Now without the pressure of attracting a new mate, we become complacent about how we look.

Just by observing married couples, we can see how their physical stature changes after a year. This holds true as the Department of Health found that married couples fail to meet the recommended 150-minute exercise per week mark.

Remarkably 76% of men and 63% of the women that were Married failed to reach the recommended exercise per week mark

And in Contrast, Only 24% of men and 33% of a woman that were Single failed to meet the recommended guideline for working out.

The Research, therefore, implies that married couples are twice as likely to be more obese compared to their single counterparts.

To further support this statement I found an interesting study on the National institute of Health that points out that divorced men who remarried showed a decline in fitness relative to those who did not remarry

Mental health

A healthy relationship has been proven to strengthen our immune system as it lowers our depression and anxiety. However, it’s not always smooth sailing in relationships. There is compromises, mistakes, and arguments that must be dealt with in an unhappy relationship.

The battles and the emotional dependency relationships have, can affect your mental health.

19% of Americans report being unhappy in their relationships. When people suffer in relationships it can create a lot of stressors and anxiety and making it difficult to feel safe or trust anyone moving forward in future dates, or relationships.

Getting involved with someone intimately can bring up past hurt and complicate any future dating or relationship

I believe experiencing being single for a decent amount of duration is needed for any individual, as it allows individuals to become more self-sufficient and independent.

To be able to embrace ourselves allows us to have better emotional stability which can translate to becoming a better romantic partner in the future if we were to choose to get into a relationship.

The Relationship Dependent Person. Many individuals I have come across are in this vicious cycle of constantly wanting to be in a relationship. So many of these individuals are coyed into believing that being single is the worst possible thing. They constantly need someone to validate them, they need the feeling of feeling wanted. Receiving attention and this quick and spontaneous search for your next romantic partner could make you end of with someone toxic.

Therefore I believe a person that stays single for a prolonged time, has a greater understanding of who they are and is more self-sufficient.

3) You’re more Self Sufficient When Single

Being Self Sufficient is defined as being emotionally and intellectually independent. Many people in this day and age cant go a week without being in a relationship.

They start getting anxious and depressed, they need another person to complete them, to assure them that they are perfect and that they belong somewhere in this world.

They end up in failed and heartbreaking relationships back to back, and they can’t really make out why this keeps happening.

“Love yourself before loving others”

If you aren’t happy when you‘re single or alone, you won’t ever be happy in a relationship. 

After my first relationship which lasted less than a month, I was in awe and heartbroken on Why? How? I let this relationship end? She was perfect.

After a couple of months of drowning myself in guilt and sadness, I came to the realization that I really didn’t know what I was doing, I was inexperienced in life, and being honest with myself I really didn’t as a person know who I was intellectually and emotionally.

Therefore I decided to put as much effort and time as I could into Self Development in body, soul, and emotions.

3 years later I decided to date again I felt good, my place self-esteem was skyrocketing, and as a romantic partner, I was just a more empathetic, exciting, and committed individual.

How To Be Self-Sufficient And Enjoy Your Time When Your Single?

This could feel pretty daunting at first. Imagine going out by yourself and enjoying a movie in the theaters or going out for a bite by yourself. Trust me it can feel like the most liberating feeling in the world, once you do it. Once you can enjoy going out by yourself, taking yourself out for dinner, traveling, going to the movies you would feel unstoppable like there’s nothing you can’t do.

1. Take yourself out for Dinner

Now I don’t mean to go to the fanciest restaurant where all the romantic couples reserve a table for Valentine’s day. Take yourself out of a shopping center and just have something to eat alone at the shopping center. Analyze your surroundings take at the moment and enjoy and appreciate your own freedom and presence.

2. Travel Alone

Why not get on a plane, train, or bus and head to any random destination for 2-3 days. Constantly try to be outside, explore, talk to random strangers and enjoy the liberating feeling it brings to you. And believe me, it is the most liberating feeling in the world, without the worry of how for example your travel partner would feel. Your free to do whatever you want to do.

3. Learn Something New

Go to a class if it’s either for your body or brain. Pursuit something even though how small of a skill it is, and pursue it with all the time in the world in your hands, try to catch up on all the big or the little things you’ve always wanted to do.

What Are The Disadvantages of Being Single?

1) People That are Single are Less Happier and Live Less

Research indicates that coupling and sharing a close bond while sharing support and intimacy has been linked to an increase in self-worth in an individual, which in turn can have a notable growth in happiness and wellbeing, while aswell lessening stress, anxiety, and depression in an individual.

However, marriage and being in a relationship comes at their own risk aswell. Marriages and coupling up aren’t all sunflowers and rainbows. As romantic individuals, you’ve got to work through a lot of issues and compromise, meaning that marriage and coupling up isn’t a guarantee of emotional well-being.

Aswell as many times, when a relationship ends in a divorce it could leave the individuals less happy compared to when they were single.

2) Judging and Shaming when Single

However much we don’t like it to be true, society has turned a wicked eye towards those who are single and believe that they have a problem. However much we tell ourselves that their opinions aren’t going to get to us, they do in some way hurt our self-esteem and beliefs in ourselves.

If we take a look at young women in our society ages 20-25. Society celebrates and motivates these young women to stay single and focus on themselves. Just 10 years around the corner women at the age of 30 are expected to have already been married and settled down, anything beyond the 30 marks, being single causes society to constantly push and judge why certain individuals are still single.

Final Thoughts

From Romantic novels, Love songs, movies. Having a mate has been instilled in the world’s DNA, from fish underwater to mammals on land such as humans, It is sort of like that cliche saying “love runs the world”.

Even though being such a big topic around the world, 44% of the American population are single. And many prefer to stay single. However, staying single has turned into such a stigma in our society? Our society has brainwashed us into believing that we are broken and not normal if we fail to have a romantic partner.

As a single man I focused on myself I enjoyed life by myself I did whatever I wanted to do without a worry in the world. But even though from the outside I seemed to be alright, on the inside I felt lonely and felt like there was something wrong with me.

Being in a relationship, I can say that I love it, but I reminisce about those days when I was single, I begin to appreciate the times I was alone, and I am grateful that I was alone. Because it taught me a lot about life about myself, I was independent stronger than if I had been a relationship addict.

I believe that experiencing being in a relationship is a wonderful thing but I believe it should be done in time and not rushed. Enjoy your time being alone learn about yourself, grow, do things that wouldn’t be possible if you were in a relationship. You don’t want to be married and then get divorced in the next 2 to 3 years. It’s better to save yourself all that heartache before it even begins.

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