4 Reasons Why Your Girlfriend Sleeps So Much| How To Deal With It?

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I haven’t been in a whole bunch of relationships, but in the relationships, I have been in, my girlfriends used to always be a bit too sleepy. Is it because women generally tend to sleep more than men? Or do I just tend to fall for girls that are sleepy heads? With some personal experience and research, I have your answer.

Why does your girlfriend sleep so much?

Many guys will call and label her lazy. That is far from the truth. There could be a couple of reasons why your girlfriend sleeps so much.

  1. She generally likes sleeping
  2. She’s going through depression
  3. Anxiety and Procrasination
  4. Poor Diet

Sometimes we could start to overthink why our girlfriend sleeps a lot, or has suddenly changed and is sleeping a lot. Continue on reading because I’ve got much more to share with you, and I’ll be helping you figure out how to communicate and ask her properly on why she sleeps so much?

Why Does My Girlfriend Sleep So Much?

Why Your Girlfriend Sleeps So Much
Image credit: freepik.com

We have all gone through weekly or monthly phases, where we just want to lay in bed all day and do nothing. It just feels like our bodies sometimes go through this hibernation process.

It’s understandable that sometimes we can have those lazy days, weeks, and months but it can seem surprising and crazy seeing some of our girlfriends sleep 12+ hours a day.

So what could be the reasons that she sleeps so much? Below I have mentioned the 4 reasons why she might be sleeping so much.

1) She Generally Likes Sleeping

In our leisure time, many of us like to go out for a hike or do something crazy like windsurfing. Many other people would rather lay in their cozy beds and watch movies or play on their phones.

If that’s the way she likes to spend her leisure time, then don’t be too judgemental of her.

My current girlfriend used to be a turbocharge ball of fire. When I first met her she was doing many sorts of extreme sports like windsurfing and skating on and off-ramps. A year later the only thing she really likes doing is laying in her bed, either cuddling with me or watching her movies.

Sometimes people change. From their activities and interests, so dont rush onto making any rash judgements.

2) She’s Going Through Depression

Around 350+ million people worldwide go through depression, so it is a very common issue people are facing all around the world. One of depression’s major symptoms is a lack of sleep or oversleeping.

Depression can cause us to have feelings of helplessness and sadness, and it could very well be a very big contributing factor towards your girlfriend staying in bed all day.

If you care much about your girlfriend you shouldn’t leave her alone to suffer through depression.

Me and my girlfriend are currently in a long-distance relationship. It takes a massive toll on both of us when we are apart. In our long-distance relationship, she would stay at home and in bed all day. Until when we would meet, she wouldn’t be in the house for a second!

Symptoms of Depression:

  • lack of interest in enjoyable activities
  • increase or decrease in appetite
  • slowing of movement
  • lack of energy
  • feelings of guilt or worthlessness.

Credits to psycom.com

3) Anxiety and Procrasination

Thinking about the future and the goals we have can sometimes worry and put us in distress. Especially in a world where so many of us have distractions like social media.

The bed can be an escape from reality and our responsibility. We have all been through this, but some of us have a lower tolerance toward unknown circumstances and events in the future.

Anxiety has been a problem all my life. Although professional help was always available to me I chose to learn how to control my anxiety myself. Through various mindful breathing techniques, I was able to see the results fast.

Symptoms of Anxiety Disorder

  • excessive worry
  • restlessness
  • being easily fatigued
  • trouble concentrating
  • irritability

Credits to psycom.com

4) Poor Diet

My girlfriend is pretty energetic when I’m around, but still, her energy tends to crash after a couple of hours of chilling or hanging out.

I had noticed that she tends to eat a lot of sugars and chocolates and she was pretty dependent on them. The problem with sugar is that it causes blood sugar to soar and then quickly dip. This sudden rise and dip in energy can leave her feeling sluggish and tired.

It won’t hurt to go for a check-up or to see a practitioner.

How Do You Deal With a Partner Who Sleeps All The Time?

How Do You Deal With a Partner Who Sleeps All The Time?
Image credit: canva.com

Many boyfriends tend to get all judgemental and label their girlfriends lazy. As a boyfriend, you should throw that attitude away, and really consider all the possibilities on why she is sleeping so much.

Even if she doesn’t have any underlying health conditions, some people just like sleeping and chilling on their bed. So don’t approach her with an empty head, or you will only distance her from you.

Labelling her lazy because she sleeps alot is unhelpful and insulting, she may have other underlying health conditions.

Below I will mention the Do’s and Dont’s on what to do when your girlfriend sleeps alot.

Best Way To Approach Your Girlfriend When She Sleeps A lot

I have always been a firm believer in communication when it comes to relationships. Its about the way you express your feeling to your partner.

Really try to be appropriate and delicate on how you structure the words you’re going to tell her.

Say something like this: “Hey baby I’ve noticed you have been really tired and sleepy lately”. “Do you notice that too”?

When you structure your sentence like this, without being too passive and judgemental, you would see that she will also respond with a “yes” or “no”, and from there you guys can discuss the issue more in detail.

Don’t Do This When Your Girlfriend Sleeps So Much

I have witnessed many of my guy friends try to take full control of the situation and try to completely change the circumstances all by themselves as if they are their fathers

Big Turn Off: Acting like the parent of the relationship and neglecting that they are their own person with their own thoughts and likes.

Don’t assume whats best for them, get out of your head and listen to what they actually want and why they are sleeping so much.

Although motivating her to make better use of her time is good, you shouldn’t over do it. Dont try to be controlling of her life. That’s why you should follow The 2x Rule.

The 2x Rule

The 2x rule. It’s a rule I learned from one of my friends many years ago. He basically said if you’re trying to tell someone something or if you’re trying to get them to do something, only say it twice.

If you say it anymore you would just frustrate them more, and especially you will drain your own energy. If they wanted to do it, they would have done it the first two times you told them.


There have been scientific studies that show sleeping too much can cause harm to the body. Many cultures and countries have their own beliefs on what is considered too much sleep and what is not.

For Example:

  • People in China sleep an average of 9 hours a day
  • Americans and Netherlands average sleep of 8 hours a day
  • Uk averages a sleep of 6 1/2 hours a day

“Everyone has their own culture or preference on how much they sleep”. Nothing is right or wrong.

Key Take Aways

  • When she’s sleeping a lot, it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with her.
  • Never ever label her “Lazy”.
  • Don’t boss her around telling her she’s wasting her time.
  • Communicate with her, and ask her if she has noticed that she’s been sleeping a lot lately as well.
  • Seek professional help, if she feels there are underlying health conditions

“Sleep better not Harder” – Sometimes her prolonged sleep could be due to bad sleep.

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That’s bullshit and excuses for bad and toxic behaviour.

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