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If your boyfriend is expecting you to pay for everything, that opens up a lot of doubts about your partner’s true intentions and financial maturity. After doing some thorough research, I came up with a couple of reasons, why your boyfriend might be expecting you to pay for everything.
There are a couple reasons to why your boyfriend might be expecting you to pay for everything.
- He is a gold digger: This type of person is solely using you for your money. And would avoid any circumstances to pay for anything.
- He is unemployed: Would avoid any circumstances to pay for things, because he is embarrassed by his lack of money.
- The un-ambitious person: Very lazy and unmotivated person, tells you to pay for everything until he gets his life together. However, he doesn’t put any effort into his life or effort in making an average living income.
Now that we have covered the types of men that could be sucking your financial and personal life, continue on reading to learn more about how to deal with each man, as well as how to avoid dating men with bad finances.
Types Of Guys That Expect You To Pay.
As discussed above we have 3 different types of men with different reasons to why they expect you to pay for everything. Read down below to learn more about these types of men and how you can spot them.
1) The gold digger
The common stereotype has always been that women are the gold diggers, but that is completely false.
The biggest fear and upset would be that the man your dating, is dating you because of your financial status.
In today’s age, many men are gold diggers, so please watch out for who you date.
Men that are gold diggers are really hard to spot, they will typically act like a normal person on a date, by paying for things, being gentlemen, and so on.
It’s at the part when they know, they’ve got you invested in them where they make a 180-degree turn and rely on you to pay for everything.
It can especially become very difficult when your emotionally attached to a toxic person, it seems like you can’t completely let go of them
- Did you know that 4 out of 10 men in their 20s and 30s would marry a partner who earns more than they do so that their spouse can pay their debts.
- Gold digger males are significantly more likely to be part of the Millennial generation (40% are male vs. 25% female).
2) The unemployed guy
This guy genuinely doesn’t have any bad intentions and is willing to help, but unfortunately, because of some circumstances, he’s unemployed. And out of the embarrassment of being unemployed, he relies on you to pay for things, till he gets his life together.
As a partner, you would want to be as supportive as possible, communicate with him, encourage him, and avoid nagging him.
But on the other, you don’t want to have a man that lives with you rent-free without contributing to the other aspects of your life.
If your boyfriend is unemployed, that’s fine. But he needs to at least be contributing to something, be that house chores or home shopping.
Unemployed Boyfriend? Ask yourself these questions:
- Is he contributing to the house chores and cooking?
- Is he being a helpful and supportive boyfriend? Or does he seem to be whining and complaining about how he can’t find a job to support you?
3) The un-ambitious guy
An unambitious guy and an unemployed person have some common similarities, but in the bigger picture of things, they are completely different kinds of people
An unemployed person is more willing to fight for his future, he has got a bigger plan for his life. He might be broke for a month or even a year. But eventually, a man that has ambition would see his life take a turn for a better suddenly.
“A guy with no job, but with drive and ambition is a man that you should try to fight for and keep around “
But an un-ambitious guy who lies on the couch and does nothing but cry and whine is a man that would sink you deeper than the titanic, in life.
How To Avoid Dating Men With Bad Finances?
In this part, we will be covering ways that will help you find out if he’s bad with his finances. So he won’t ever use you for your money in the future.
In the dating world, you can never know what to expect. Everything might seem ok at first, but once you get to know them better you uncover a lot about their true intentions and what type of people they are in life.
Did you know that money worries can cause the most strain in a relationship.
The Daily Mail found some statistics on the most stressful things in a relationship
- Money Worries – 62%
- Working long hours: 40%
- Extra marital affairs: 36%
- Not understanding each other: 34%
- Family Rows: 24%
He has very expensive taste.
When on a date with a man, try to get to know him as well as possible. Open up conversations about his work life, his ambitions, and so on.
Continue to understand his life better especially his spending and financial life.
- Does he spend similar to what he earns? Or does he overspend with what his salary or budget is?
- Does he have very expensive taste? When you go out with him, where do you guys go eat?
- What kind of clothes does he wear? Are they high-end fashion clothing?
It is fairly simple to understand a man’s personal management of money.
Blaming his financial troubles
Ask him about his previous relationships. Don’t beat around the bush, you are two individuals dating and getting to know each other better.
It is better to learn someone’s past relationships, so you can understand what works and what didn’t work for them.
If a man blames his Ex for spending too much money or putting him in a financial crisis. That is a clear sign that this man is terrible with money.
if a man says words such as “I’m Broke or I have Financial problems“ that means that he’s probably going to ask you to pay on future dates as the relationship becomes serious.
Difference between potential and actual work
Potential means showing or having the capacity to develop into something in the future.
Even if a man is broke and lazy, many women that I have seen, seem to cling on and stay with such man, because they believe in their potential for growth and as human beings.
Potential is just a word we use when we know the truth about someone, but we want to buy ourselves more time in thinking that they can actually be better than they are.
Potential is an imagination many women believe in, but ask yourself is potantial enough when:
- Your going through a tough time and you would need someone to hold your hand
- Is potential enough to give you the love and support you need?
Potential is ok to some extent, but ask yourself how far are you willing to go? Are you sure this potential will turn into something real or will it just be some potential but nothing more besides it?
It is Hard Work
It’s the thing you can see and feel. From the communication and actions that soothe your anxiety, and assures you and that you’re on one page with your partner. A goal and objective to grow and be there for each other.
Understand Why You Should Move On From Him.
There is a lot of emotional carriage in a relationship. It can feel like the hardest thing in the world, to have to put an end to a relationship, even though you know it is not the one for you.
Below I have mentioned 2 points that you should consider if your thinking of breaking up with your boyfriend because he’s expecting you to pay all the time.
What are your fears when he constantly uses you for money?
A relationship isn’t all about rainbows and fun. There should be actual commitment in a relationship. Working with each other, working through each others problems and so on.
However sometimes our intuitions tell us otherwise. There could be something else happening in this relationship besides love and commitment.
So what are your fears in a relationship where your boyfriend doesn’t pay for anything?
- Ending up in debt and broke
- carrying the whole load of the relationship and fearing you won’t be able to handle it.
- Being scared of being taken advantage of
Try to uncover your own feelings and choose the right behavior to engage in a conversation with your partner. This will serve you better
If you approach with anger and finger-pointing, your partner will push back from being judged.
Think logically not emotionally
We are here as indivuals to grow and create a life for ourselves.
So ask yourself, is your boyfriend helping you grow or bringing you down?
Don’t think that you have a universal obligation to this person. Know when enough is enough and move on
From growing up, we have all been taught, that It is human nature and a common way of life to expect the man to be the provider.
In today’s generation, we are seeing more men use women for their money. And it is becoming a huge problem because it is leaving many women manipulated and heartbroken.
Fact: A women will go through two long-term relationships and have her heartbroken twice before she meets ‘The One’
In this dating and relationship age, it can almost feel like a gamble being with someone. Sometimes you might end up with psychopaths that want to manipulate and use you for your money.
Above I mentioned ways to help you understand the different types of men that use you for your money and how you can deal and communicate with a man that contributes to nothing in the relationships finances.
Avoid gold-digging and lazy men by understanding and picking out the best and Right Qualities In a Man.
Click down below to learn about the qualities that make the right high-value man.
Hey guys! my name is Farid Babajan and I’m the co-founder of relationshipwhatsup.com. Around 5 years ago I came out of a relationship which I wasn’t too happy about. Afterward, I decided to start kicking ass in life and in relationships. Getting to understand people around me better as well as myself. This has allowed me to share with you all my knowledge on Love, Romance as well as complications and problems in relationships.